Death, Dreams and all that In Between

Death: Two deaths occurred in my life this week: our oldest dog, who has been nothing but a joyful pleasure in my life… and someone who has brought nothing but painful torture to my life. One of them is in a better place… the other, I believe, is facing their “final judgment,” explaining to the “man upstairs” all the reasons why they caused grief in my life (or at least, that is what I am telling myself). I did not cry over either death: first, because death is a part of life; and second, because both were for the best (for reasons already covered). Death is such a strange phenomenon, because those who are affected are the living.

Dreams: I’m not talking about those strange images you have while you are asleep… that’s a completely different discussion, filled with assumptions of what it means to be chased by gigantic white bunnies or be eaten alive by blood sucking ladybugs. I am referring to “tomorrow.” Isn’t that what a dream is? Isn’t the idea of what may happen tomorrow, or what you want to happen tomorrow, the very basis of a dream? The definition of a dream (dictionary.com) is an aspiration; goal; aim. See, it is, in a sense, the future and what you want the future to be like. Do you think that people who believe in predestination, also have dreams? Maybe if they do, they would be more accurately referred to as “hopes.” The definition of “hope” is to look forward to with desire and reasonable confidence. I told you.
One has to begin to wonder if dreams are the substance of life. If you lived your life without them, what would you have to look forward to tomorrow? Although, another way to look at it… if you stopped dreaming and just started living for today… well, you sure would have to be happy about what was happening in the moment, wouldn’t you? I want to be happy about the moment.

And all that In Between: Now, life gets filled with the stuff that happens between dreams and death. For some – what happens in between will be those dreams coming true. For others – the in between will be spent either dreaming about tomorrow or fearing the end result. I, for one, want for a lot of things in the in between (sure does sound like a dream, huh). Above all, I want to enjoy all the things in between… and that is hard to do. The in between things are paying bills, working, cleaning, worrying about paying the bills, worrying about working, and so on. I want to buy a hut with Lane, in a really small village on an island – or maybe, a villa in another country – or land in Alaska where there is a one traffic light and quiet time. I want to write, I want to be, I want to dream… and find the time to live out some of those dreams. I want to consume all of the in between that I can… and enjoy every tasty morsel of it. Death doesn’t scare me, as much as dreams do… death is almost easier than the dreams, because you have NO control over death – but dreams, they are always pushing on your shoulders and filling up the stuff “in between.”